Roots in Gaza

When the flotilla of fools finally lands in Gaza, they will have a wealth of dining options to choose from. Among the many fine restaurants, I would most particularly suggest Roots. Steak au poivre, yum!


From Lonely Planet:
"By far the most expensive up-scale restaurant in Gaza, Roots is where important people dine on steak au poivre and chicken cordon bleu, though, since alcohol isn't served, there's no washing it down with a good vintage of anything other than Coke. Owner Basil Eleiwa and partners sunk US$1.1 million into the place, which has a nice outdoor area for evening dining, and incorporates the Green Terrace Café, serving sandwiches, mezze and light lunches all day long in less formal surroundings. "


For their benefit I have done a bit of research.


MENU - ROOTS The Club


Soups
Served only in winter

Onion soup
Cream of Mushroom Soup
Sream of Spinach Soup
Corn & Chicken Soup
Tomato Dill Soup
Vegetable Soup
Lentil Soup
Freekeh Soup
Roots Special Sea Food Soup

Salads

French Green Salad
Lettuce Salad
Rocket Salad
Rocket & Mushroom Salad
Greek Salad
Caesar Salad
Chicken Salad
Tuna Salad
Shrimp Salad

Salads from Greens kitchen

Green Salad
Avocado Salad
Turkish Spicy Salad
Tabbouleh
Fattoush
Hummos
Baba Ghannoush
Bakdounsyeh
Cabbage Salad
Potato Salad
Eggplant Salad
Pea Salad with Mayonnaise
Labneh with Olives
Labneh with Chili Pepper
Cucumber in Yogurt
Green Kishkeh
Dagga Ghazzaweya
Dagga with tahini
Assorted Pickles
Shinkleesh

Appetizers

Shrimp Cocktail
Smoked Salmon
Chicken Liver Pate
Sesame Chicken Fingers
Buffalo Spicy Chicken Wings
Spring Rolls
Cheese Canapés
Mushroom Canapés
Garlic Mushroom Circles
Fried Cheese
Hummos with Meat and Pine Nuts
Fried Kebbeh
Fried Nakanek
Stuffed Grape Leaves
Cicchetti Olives
Garlic Bread

Sea Food Corner

Deep Fried Sea Bass
Half a pound of sea bass fillet deep fried and served hot with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Baked Sea Bass With Garlic Sauce
Whole one pound sea bass baked in heavy garlic and lemon sauce and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Trout Meunière
Pan fried whole boneless trout fish cooked in cream and almond sauce.
Served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Deep Fried Red Mullet
Eight fresh re mullet marinated in lemon and parsley sauce and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Baked Danees With Garlic Sauce
Whole one pound danees fish baked in heavy garlic and lemon sauce and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Grilled Danees
Whole one pound danees fish marinated, grilled and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Deep Fried Fish Combination
Fish combination of sea bass, red mullet, calamari and shrimp marinated in lemon and parsley sauce, deep fried and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Deep Fried Shrimp
Eight jumbo or ten medium shrimps marinated in lemon and parsley sauce, deep fried and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Deep Fried Breaded Shrimp
Eight jumbo or ten medium shrimps marinated, breaded, deep fried and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Grilled Shrimp
Eight jumbo or ten medium shrimps marinated, grilled and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Shrimp With Dill and Lemon Sauce
Eight jumbo or ten medium shrimps marinated and cooked in dill and lemon sauce and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Shrimp With Chili Pepper Sauce
Eight jumbo or ten medium shrimps marinated and cooked in hot chili pepper and lemon sauce. Served with steamed rice or fries.

Curried Shrimp
Eight jumbo or ten medium shrimps cooked in heavy curry sauce and vegetables. Served with steamed rice or fries.

Sizzling Shrimp Platter
Eight jumbo or ten medium shrimps cooked with vegetables and special spicy sauce and served hot on a sizzling platter.

Shrimp Casserole
Ten or twelve small shrimps marinated and cooked in hot chili pepper, tomato and pine nuts sauce. Served with steamed rice or fries.

Deep Fried Calamari
Half a pound of shrimp and calamari combination marinated, deep fried and served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Sole Meunière
Pan fried whole boneless sole fish in butter and almond sauce.
Served with cucumber, tomato and lemon slices.

Meat Corner

Mushroom Steak
Half a pound of beef fillet cooked in creamy mushroom sauce and served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Steak Au Poivre (pepper Steak)
Half a pound of beef fillet cooked in creamy pepper sauce and served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Teriyaki Steak
Half a pound of beef fillet cooked in exquisite teriyaki sauce and served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Swiss Steak
Half a pound of sirloin slices cooked in sweet and sour sauce and topped with slices of tomato. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Pavés De Rumsteak Au Poivre Vert
(Sirloin Steak with Green Peppercorns)
Half a pound of sirloin steak cooked in brown veal stock, cream and green peppercorns sauce. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Chateaubriand With Béarnaise Sauce
Half a pound of chateaubriand slices cooked in rich béarnaise sauce and served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Rouelles de Veau Bourgeoise
(Veal with Pickling Onions and Mushrooms)
Half a pound of our tender veal slices cooked in pickling onions and mushroom. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Veal Scaloppini
Half a pound of breaded veal cooked in creamy sauce and topped with cheese. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Concord Stuffed Fillet Rolls
Half a pound of fillet rolls stuffed with vegetables and cooked in our special sour tarragon sauce. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Sizzling Platter
Half a pound of tenderloin slices cooked in a creamy flavored sauce of onions and peppers. Served with steamed rice.

Kung Pao Style Beef
The most famous style of Szechwan cooking is served to you with a multiplicity of taste. Hot and spicy can be enjoyed. Served with steamed rice.

Chicken Corner

Cordon Bleu
Breaded chicken breast filled with smoked goose breast and mushroom and cooked in a creamy mushroom sauce.

Chicken Scalloppini
Breaded tender chicken breast cooked in creamy sauce and topped with cheese. Served with French fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Lemon Chicken Sauté
Half a pound of chicken thighs cooked in an onion and lemon sauce and served with French fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Concord Stuffed Chicken Rolls
Half a pound of breaded chicken breast stuffed with ground beef and cheese and cooked in a creamy sauce. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Chicken Stroganof
Half a pound of chicken breast slices cooked in a creamy flavored sauce of onions and peppers. Served with steamed rice.

Tarragon Chicken
Half a pound of boneless chicken breast cooked in tarragon creamy sauce. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Chicken Picata
Breaded tender chicken breast cooked in lemon, onion and parsley sauce. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Thyme Chicken
Half a pound of boneless chicken thighs marinated and cooked in thyme sauce. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Kung Pao Chicken
Enjoy half a pound of tender chicken breast slices cooked in a variety of ingredients such as Szechwan peppers, hot red pepper, dark soy sauce, sugar and peanuts. Served with steamed rice.

Sweet And Sour Chicken
Tender chicken breast slices cooked in sweet and sour sauce and served with steamed rice.

Chow Mein Chicken With Cashews
Tender chicken breast slices cooked with noodles and cashews in rice Chow Mein sauce.

Curried Chicken
Tender chicken breast slices cooked in heavy curry sauce and served with steamed rice.

Shish Tawouk
Half a pound of chicken thighs marinated in olive oil and lemon sauce and grilled to your taste. Served with fries, baked potato or vegetable sauté.

Pasta Corner

Fettuccine Alfredo
Enjoy the real taste of Italian fettuccine with mushroom.

Fettuccine Marinara
Enjoy the real taste of Italian fettuccine with smoked salmon and marinara sauce.

Sea Food Fettuccine
Enjoy the real taste of Italian fettuccine with shrimp and calamari cooked in hot tomato sauce.

Lasagne
Layers of lasagna pasta filled with ground beef, cheese and mushroom and cooked in our special sauce.

Vegetable Lasagne
Layers of lasagna pasta filled with vegetables and cheese and cooked in our special sauce.

Spaghetti Polognese
Enjoy our spaghetti with hot polognese sauce.

Spaghetti Napolitana
Enjoy this vegetarian dish with our special tomato sauce.

Maccaroni Tarragon
Enjoy our spaghetti with chicken breast and creamy tarragon sauce.



Ambiance Galore
Beautifully designed buffets
Every detail handled for you.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------


Gosh, it sounds so wonderful!
And so many of these 'freedom flotilla' dunces are traveling on European tax money, so it can all be expensed!
I am so jealous.


Note: many of the meat dishes are cooked with dairy. This might present a problem for any Jews who might be tagging along with the European socialists, rabid Irish anti-Semites, and ignorant American radicals.
But most of them, being Jewish in name only, and only when it is expedient, should not be worried in the slightest. It has been several years since even a shred of Jewishness was part of their lives.
The rest of their merry gang of morons wouldn't touch kosher with a ten foot pole anyhow.

Bon appétit!


周小燕

Moon on the West River

By no means Cantopop. More like the old-timey stuff. And it's in Mandarin.


月·西江
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udytmgCPBLw

[Yes, that actually says "Moon... West River". The lyricist (Solpie) made that quite clear, writing: 这曲子名字叫做《月·西江》不是《西江月》. It isn't West River Moon. ]

Version with very Japanesy images:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0JjPn8IRT7w


LYRICS:

日暮江水远
入夜随风迁
秋叶乱水月
疏影倚窗边

夜末香未眠
寻花情已倦
愁上晚柳月
思念两处闲

你的美 望穿东去流水
温柔怎耐长夜 澜风冰雪
花见泪 洒落在飘~零间
满山哭红的叶 任风随

晚风岸抚~柳~ 笛声残
看红叶 秋色染
飘零满江 千里风~霜
扶手一行茉莉纱 不觉胭~脂伤
泪~沿江倾~~洒

水依然长~流~ 莫相伴
梦已晚 秋水涨
雁字回时 愁断人肠
泪已漫长夜之觞
山水 两~茫茫
水~ 把琴声淌

Source: http://solpie.blog.163.com/blog/static/643831672010491455378/

Very lovely indeed.


周小燕

Happily quoting myself

The other day (Wednesday) I wrote a spur of a moment comment on a facebook entry that, with the hindsight and profound wisdom of TWO WHOLE DAYS, now actually impresses me that I thought it.

Ahem (clears throat, coughs)........


"Diplomacy is where 'plausible deniability' and 'public relations' intersect. Ergo: "I knew there was NO chance of success, but I was instructed to play to the gallery, so I went through the motions with all the straightness of face I could muster!".
Often followed by: "It was someone else's fault!"."


Of course, this is also rather obvious. Especially if you've been following Hillary Clinton's mad twirling on the international stage, and what her various righ hand men have been doing. Or not doing.


[ DOT DOT DOT ]


Smiles to herself. Hits 'publish post' button.
Sits back and waits for accalu, occalo, accolai, accaload, erm............................., profound words of praise to roll in.



周小燕

Fisking a fruitbat

Over the course of several days I have been "discussing" the vandalism committed against rabbi Lerner in Berkeley with an anonymous commenter underneath a post by Ami Isseroff.

[Here: http://proisraelbaybloggers.blogspot.com/2010/05/decent-people-must-condemn-attack-on.html ]


Everybody rightly condemns the vandalism - it was a cowardly act, and it's intent was to threaten someone for deeply held if totally berserk personal beliefs. In the United States you are allowed to believe whatever you wish, no matter how wrong, no matter how crazy - and several people indulge in that right.

Such as that particular commenter. Who proves himself very very wrong, and, quite possibly, crazy as a bedbug.

His most recent comment was to aver something ridiculous, and provide a link to an article supposedly backing that claim.

QUOTE:
"Look, lerner got PUNKED for real by alice walker on Yom Kippur last year!!! lerner's stupidity back fires on him by his own admission on beyt tikkun's website."

Besides being totally irrelevant, and having nothing at all to do with any of the issues in that comment string, that article actually proves entirely the opposite - Lerner to his credit justifiably calls Alice Walker to task for lying about rapes in the disputed territories.

Consequently, I have attempted to demonstrate to him (the commenter - assuming it's a 'him', as he is far too stupid to be a woman) that well, no, his assertion isn't borne out by the article to which he linked.
I have done so in this post:
http://proisraelbaybloggers.blogspot.com/2010/05/rabbi-lerner-vandalism-and-morons.html


Honestly, folks, if Rabbi Lerner or that commenter were in any way representative of Jews, it would be utterly surprising that Judaism had survived this long and that Israel had ever been reborn as an independent nation. Fortunately they aren't.
Though both of them are, in their muddled thinking and ridiculous assumptions, good clear arguments for valium and public whippings.


周小燕

Jewish pigs!

Arabs in the Shomron and Gallil are blaming Jews for uprooting their vines, destroying their groves, and befouling a source of water.
The local Jews in question are porcine. Not Ashkenazic, nor Sephardic. Porcine. Not Mizrahi, nor even Gurji. Porcine. Perhaps 'Judeo-Porcine'.

I assume that they wear suede yarmulkes.


According to Jameel at the Muqata:
"Wild Boar are indigenous to Israel's hilly regions, specifically the Shomron and Galil."
[cut]
"This past Monday evening, a motorcyclist was killed in the Western Galil when he hit a wild boar on the road."

Source: http://muqata.blogspot.com/2010/05/when-wild-boars-attack.html


The local Arabs, unwilling to believe that there has been a pig problem since time immemorial, choose to blame the Jews.
Why?
Because Jews and Pork, obviously, go together. No question about it.


If you aren't an Arab, you probably understand the sheer lunacy of linking Jews and Pork.
Yes, there are some Jews who eat Pork, just like there are Jews who eat Shrimp, or Lobster.
The rest of us wish they wouldn't do that - there just isn't enough Pork, or Shrimp, or Lobster to go around - but almost always, if you're frying up a load of bacon, you do not need an additional place-setting for a visiting Jew.
Jews and Pork are normally like oil and water. You can have fun with Jews, you can have fun with pork. Not both.

But the Arabs feel themselves set upon. They not only have Jews, but there is wild angry pork running around. It is all too much.
They are.... what's that word.... FARKLEMPT!


So, in the spirit of encouraging peace, co-existence, and lots of fluffy bunny rabbits and all kinda furry love, I have a solution which will make EVERYONE happy.


Jameel, sweetheart (I'm calling you sweetheart coz despite your Arab-sounding handle I know you're actually a nice man), please invite a bunch of Cantonese Americans to the Shomron.
We Cantonese Americans LOVE pig. And really, we don't mind at all that they are "up to 200 pounds, the males have very sharp tusks, and it takes more than a handgun's bullet to knock a charging wild boar off its feet."
That's 200 pounds of dense flavorful meat! Any Cantonese American worth the name can deal with that, with one hand tied behind her back.
Trust me on this, babe.
Have you ever met a Cantonese mother in law? We can deal with angry monsters every day, some of us even turn into them.
Two hundred pounds of bad-tempered gaminess. Oh yes.


I'm thinking ginger, garlic, and star-anise. Slow cooked, with yams and taro root.


So you see, dear man, the pig problem, and hence the "porcine native" problem, are both easily solved. As well as the problem of there not being enough treif for the rest of us.

We promise we'll go home BEFORE we turn into monsters.
Do we have a date?


周小燕

UC San Diego divestment - again!

FROM STAND WITH US:


Dear Friends of Israel,

The student community at UC San Diego is once again facing a divestment debate this evening, Wednesday May 5th.

The anti-Israel leadership has already started sending emails, letters, petitions, and propaganda campaigns to promote their mission for the sake of demonizing Israel on campus.

The anti-Israel group is calling for their supporters to show up in huge numbers. They are saying that "This historic resolution is a huge step forward for our cause."

The location of the meeting will begin at 6:00 p.m.
at UCSD Price Center Ballroom East
Address: 9500 Gilman Dr., La Jolla, CA 92093

Anti-Israel leadership is asking people to write letters to the ASUCSD Council Members, and we must encourage friends of Israel to do the same. The addresses and sample letter are below.

Please forward this call to action to your friends.

Write a short letter to the Associated Students president,
the UC San Diego chancellor, and the president of the University of California regarding the divestment bill at UC San Diego.
The subject of the e-mail can read, "Please say NO to the unfair divestment bill."

Below is a sample letter.
Please feel free to copy and paste it, or write a letter of your own.
Please do this by 4:00 o'clock today, Wednesday, May 5.

Sample Letter:

I urge you to vote NO to the anti-Israel divestment bill. The bill is a manipulative way to push an extremist agenda that seeks to marginalize Israel and anyone who supports it on campus. It should be clear to you that the one-sided nature of the bill divided students at Berkeley and has divided the UCSD student body. There are consequences for this division, including name calling and even swastikas at Berkeley.

It should also be clear that Hamas and terrorism are missing from the bill and from all the speeches being made by the pro-divestment side, in an effort to demonize Israel. If the group presenting this bill were truly pro-Palestinian, they would be working to promote peace, and they would be working against Hamas. They would be concerned about the suffering of both people, and they would talk about the context instead of only addressing Israel's response to terrorism.

Simply put: Unfortunately, on campuses across the country, this aggressive campaign is being used to empower the political aims of an extremist and hostile group that seeks to promote one-sided propaganda against Israel.

Please vote no on divestment.

Thank you so much for your urgent consideration.
Sign your name, school, affiliation, etc.

E-mail your letter to:
aspresident@ucsd.edu , chancellor@ucsd.edu , president@ucop.edu

Please Cc your letter to: o1khan@ucsd.edu , jehrhart@ucsd.edu , thaglund@ucsd.edu , katiehall007@gmail.com , akenwort@ucsd.edu , bpena@ucsd.edu , dprevo@ucsd.edu , cbthomas@ucsd.edu , a6vu@ucsd.edu , k1hoang@ucsd.edu , tppham@ucsd.edu , mfvalent@ucsd.edu , bmceuen@ucsd.edu , rorear@ucsd.edu , lswerhon@ucsd.edu , velin@ucsd.edu , jnstorey@ucsd.edu , nmetildi@ucsd.edu , pnuth@ucsd.edu , jdcondel@ucsd.edu , MegChat101@gmail.com , iiahmed@ucsd.edu , a2powers@ucsd.edu , jsgrossm@ucsd.edu , awing@ucsd.edu , asvpstudentlife@ucsd.edu , asvpexternal@ucsd.edu , asvpfinance@ucsd.edu , with a copy to info@standwithus.com

Thank you in advance for helping the UCSD pro-Israel, pro-peace student community.

周小燕

PILAR RAHOLA SPEECH

Quote: "Why don't we see demonstrations against Islamic dictatorships in London , Paris , Barcelona ? Or demonstrations against the Burmese dictatorship?"

Good questions, no?
Read the rest here:
http://proisraelbaybloggers.blogspot.com/2010/04/pilar-rahola-speech.html


Go read it.
Thank you, Snooky, for posting it.


周小燕

Worries about the UC San Diego Divestment campaign

Thinking about college is not something I planned to do quite as yet, yet it is being thrust upon me. Living in California, naturally West-Coast universities are the most logical potential choices.


Except that they are less and less attractive.

UC Berkeley is out of the question – the atmosphere on the campus across the bay is so thoroughly hateful that it would be downright dangerous to go there unless one supported dictatorships like Venezuela, North Korea, and Iran.

San Francisco State, still reasonably affordable, is sodden with rabid anti-Americans and partisans of third-world gangsters, besides having had its courses severely reduced as well as its academic standards diminished.

Irvine and most of the other minor hinterland schools are also not on my short-list; I am neither fond of the farmbelt, nor of insulated campus communities. A pity, really. Life would be SO much easier if I just got along with those people. And those OTHER people.

[Concerning the California educational institutions in the bush, this from Arutz Sheva: "Many of the activities of these groups specifically harass and intimidate Jewish students," they write, and "it is not inconceivable that these groups' anti-Semitic discourse and hostility could escalate into incidents of physical violence. Nevertheless, California administrators have been unwilling to respond to, or even acknowledge, the threats that Jewish students face on their campuses."
If Jews are not safe, how much less so those of us who are clearly recognizable as urbanite ethnic? California does NOT a have a history ofkindly treatment of Chinese and Japanese, and some attitudes still thrive out in the Valley that are better restrained in the Bay Area. Now, I happen to get along with Jews. While absolutely loathing, and being filled with disgust by, the typical Arab attitudes towards little yellow women.]


And now, oh woe, San Diego is probably also out of the question.


Even though the ACUCSD president (Utsav Gupta) has come out in favor of a nay vote (“To this end, I will be voting against the passage of this resolution”), it does not seem likely that the issue will ever go away.
The slimy tactics of the SJP at Berkeley are becoming the role model for ideological anti-Semites up and down the state. Helped, of course, by such organizations as AlAwda, the AROC, ISM, and International ANSWER.

[Al-Awda opposes Israel's right to exist, supports foreign terrorist organizations such as Hamas and Hizbullah, organizes anti-Israel rallies and events, and features anti-Semitic speakers at its events. The AROC is funded by The Tides Foundation and serves as the outside agitator at many events in the Bay Area. The International Solidarity Movement (ISM) is a borderline still debatablylegal pro-Hamas and pro-Hezbollah partisan group with such stellar models of probity as Paul Larudee, Alice Walker, and Cynthia McKinney among its praise-singers, and International ANSWER are the rebranded Marxists and revolutionary anti-American arm-chair socialists who have sought to take over the left for nearly a decade, and largely succeeded. Do I also need to mention the Women in Black and Code Pink?]


I shall have to think the unthinkable. University, a few years from now, will be either in Massachusetts (two strong contenders), or New England (one).


Do they even HAVE decent Chinese food there?


Better eat all I can now. My late teens are going to be ghastly.


周小燕

If that's the answer, you shouldn't have posed the question!

The internet is possibly the worst thing ever put in the hands of certain people. Yes, it can be used for good. Most of the time it's used for pornography, lolcats, and pictures of stupid things.

And sometimes, sometimes, it proves that a shallow genepool is a very bad thing.


Enter The Ninja
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wc3f4xU_FfQ
By Die Antwoord.
It represents South African 'Kulcha'!
And butterflies.


Five and a half minutes of funky honky hiphop proving beyond any possible doubt that inbred gangly blondes are your worst nightmare, tattooed stringy white boys should not rap (ever!), and people with an Asian thing going on are often quite quite loopy. Good lord almighty, this is a bad video; it redifines bad, and adds layer upon putrid layer of rotten bad-ass badness to the very concept of bad. This is more than bad, it is loathsome, nauseating, nasty, frightening, and repulsive.
Badder than this is hard to imagine.


It is also the most amusing thing I've seen all week. My stomach aches and I'm hoarse with laughter.

Which, it turns out, may be more or less what the "musical geniuses" of Die Antwoord ('the answer') intended all along.

The Wikipedia entry on the band, if read between the lines, indicates that they may actually know what they are doing (however unlikely though that seems). Their website seems to be dense with the F word, and has some LOVELY pictures of inbred salt of the earth types.

I am torn between being repulsed, and appreciating their feral charm.
They'll be touring in the northern hemisphere sometime this year.
You can't wait. Might as well admit it.
Hwot kaik yay, poes.


周小燕

Fine white ash

So another blogger thanked me very prettily for posting four links to his blog, then asked why I had chosen those particular four. I disabused him of the notion that it was because they are excellent pieces.

He's a decent if prolix writer, but those links had nothing to do with literary merit.
They were all tight little blinkered holes into the dark pit of his soul.
A smelly, reeky, smokey swamp of existential angst.
Black, boring, tobacco posts.

[Gratuitous Link Cluster: THIS, THAT, THE OTHER THING, and SMTHG ELSE.]

I was amazed at the passion he has for that strange subject. See, he writes about all kinds of things, but when he writes about smoking, it's almost like he's describing his favorite sexual position. Without any sense of shame or reserve.
It's not about his wooden object, there is no queer symbolism. It's the pipe tobacco.

For years he's had an unrequited love affair with a product named "Balkan Sobranie", the mistress-slut-virgin-whore and girl-next-door of pipe tobaccos, yay, even the Mary Magdalene of Oriental Blends.
Balkan Sobranie Original Mixture has had many casual lovers, but Atboth is probably the first bonafide stalker for a smoking tobacco ever. He longs, passionately, to dip his sweaty Charatan or Sasieni Four Dot deep into her soft and spongy silken shreds again, stroke her firmly into submission, then light her up. Puff.
Oooooooooh!!! And 'Mmmmmmmm!'

Disgusting!

It's quite the nastiest thing to which I've ever been exposed. I live in San Francisco, so I know from depravity too.
Grant Patel likes panties. Snooky lusts after a motorbike. Dovbear teases Hareidi Jews. Midinaite Manna loves her husband and her baby. Steg is studying to become a rabbit.
[Lily Haskell picks on Jews, Jameel settles the West Bank, Harry provides answers to questions I had not yet thought of asking, Dick Becker waves his tiny shrimp-like dongus, and Treppenwitz writes wittily about living in the best of all possible lands. These are a few of my favorite things. No, I shall NOT mention "I can has cheez burger", it's just too flippin' precious! Icky!]


Mister Atboth rhapsodizes about smelly dead leaves. Balkan Sobranie.


He wrote "you should've see the fine white ash I used to tap".
I thought he was making an obscene and boastful reference to a long-past sexual exploit, or a portion of his own anatomy (as boys are wont to do), till the next line made clear that it was what he knocked out of his pipe after smoking.
Fine white ash, "velvety", and of "an even and uniform small grit".

Pipe smokers are neurotic.
Which is a nice polite way of saying nuts.


周小燕

I'm halfway towards becoming a lesbian

My auntie had a child two days ago. A male. It was quite a feat.

He's a fat little fleshball. Looks like a taro root. Nineteen and a half inches (nearly), eight and a half pounds (slightly more than).
She said it was like passing a cinder block.

In slow motion.


EeeeeeeeeeW!!!!!!!!


I am so not having kids if I can help it!


Once I asked my mom about sex, and she told me "let your husband teach you".
Well number one, no thanks, I'd rather know what I'm getting into BEFORE it happens, and number two, junior high really has changed since you were young, mom. You won't believe what some of these white kids have on their facebook pages.

Some of them are just begging for stalkers.


I asked you because I wanted the clean version!!!


Apparently, you don't know that one either.

Or you're not letting on.

So yeah. The magic of procreation can go fly a kite. Biology is a bitch. Not going there.


周小燕

Balkan Sobranie till you're sick of it!

Sometimes, when your scrolling through someone else’s blog, you notice one thing which proves that the writer has a screw loose. An obsession, or a queer perversion, that you already suspected but you just didn’t know how deep it went. It may appall you. OR not.


Good example:
http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/search/label/Balkan%20Sobranie/
"Balkan Sobranie – all posts" (At the back of the Hill).


HOLY COW!


He's insane.

Consider, if I will, this post:
http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/2008/08/balkan-sobranie-postscript.html


Ten whole pages of stuff. About. A. Pipe. Tobacco. Mixture. Called. BALKAN SOBRANIE!!!

Taste and blending notes, comparisons, and a loving tribute.


Now, girls I could understand. Girls are pretty neat. Even dishy altar boys. But he's writing about pipe tobacco! Pipe freaking tobacco!



Then there's this one:
http://atthebackofthehill.blogspot.com/2007/10/balkan-sobranie-original-mixture.html

Much shorter, but still a turgid overload of love poem to a long gone stinky product. You'd think he was writing about his favorite pastry. Or fish paste.
Plus more instructive notes and comparisons.


I also clicked on a link named "Tobacco List", and that was a frightfully stupid thing to do - forty pages or so of stuff about pipe tobacco - a lot of which is, obviously, about Balkan Sobranie and mr. Atboth's deep enduring love affair with his stinky mistress.
He loves to roll in it, to touch it, to fondle it, rub it all over his pasty middle aged torso, and breathe deeply and passionately of its heady perfume. Balkan Sobranie is better than ten women!
He remembers each and every lustY embrace of Balkan Sobranie, each tar-stained kiss, each sooty frolic, and each sultry shred of stimulus. Balkan Sobranie!
That's pipe tobacco we're talking about, he isn't talking about ME, thank god even though I'm jealous, or even any other young ladies. Just pipe tobacco! Pervert!


If he we're a teenage boy, he'd write about girls. Girls with great big casabas, long legs, and blonde hair waving in the breeze, wide round eyes, slightly parted lips, and vacant expressions on their simple pie-faces (precisely NOT like me!).
But he's an elderly Dutchman, no longer hormonally gifted, possibly dried up.... so tobacco instead.
Way to go, man! I really so want to be pipe tobacco when I grow up and move out!
Girls are a dime a dozen, but pipe tobacco inspires lasting passion.


Oh, and another thing, if you're reading this mister Atboth, I just gave you FOUR links. You now owe me.


周小燕